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A Rainbow of Devotion In category: Drunks/Bar jokes
A nun, a priest, an Irishman, a Jew, a Scotsman, a rabbi and a blonde walk into a bar.
The bartender looks at them and asks, "Is this some kind of joke?"  
read joke

Added by: xXxpubeyxXx on 12-Jan-2008 Tags: Rainbow | Devotion | Drunks/Bar jokes |

Redneck At The Bar In category: Redneck
A bartender was washing glasses one afternoon when an elderly Irishman came in.
With great difficulty, the Irishman hoisted his bad leg over the barstool, pulled himself up painfully, and asked for a sip of Irish whiskey.
The Irishman looked down the bar and said, "Is that Jesus down there?" The bartender nodded, so the Irishman told him to give Jesus an Irish whiskey, too.
The next patron to come in was an ailing Italian with a hunched back, who moved very slowly.
He shuffled up to the barstool and asked for a glass of Chianti.
He also looked down the bar and asked if that was Jesus sitting at the end of the bar.
The bartender nodded, so the Italian said to give Him a glass of Chianti, too.
The third patron to enter the bar was a redneck, who swaggered into the bar and hollered, "Barkeep, set me up a cold one! Hey, is that God's Boy down there?"
The barkeep nodded, so the redneck told him to give Jesus a cold one, to 
read joke

Added by: samantharox on 02-Jan-2008 Tags: Redneck | Redneck |

An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing... In category: Blonde jokes
nstruction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, "Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm going to jump off this building." The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, Burritos again! If I get burritos one more time I'm going to jump off, too." The blond opened his lunch and said, Bologna again! If I get a bologna sandwich one more time, I'm jumping too." The next day, the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage, and jumped to his death. The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a burrito, and jumped, too. The blonde guy opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death as well. At the funeral, the Irishman's wife was weeping. She said, "If I'd known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have given it to him again!" The Mexican's wife also wept and said, "I could have given him tacos or enchiladas! I did read joke

Added by: trident on 10-Feb-2008 Tags: Irishman | | Mexican | Blonde | were | doing... | Blonde jokes |

BMW thinks of everything In category: Celebrities
On a golf tour in Ireland, Tiger Woods drives his BMW into a petrol station in a remote part of the Irish countryside. The pump attendant, obviously knows nothing about golf, greets him in a typical Irish manner completely unaware of who the golfing pro is. "Top of the mornin' to yer, sir" says the attendant. Tiger nods a quick "hello" and bends forward to pick up the nozzle. As he does so, two tees fall out of his shirt pocket onto the ground. "What are those?, asks the attendant. "They're called tees" replies Tiger. "Well, what on the god's earth are dey for?" inquires the Irishman. "They're for resting my balls on when I'm driving", says Tiger. "Fookin Jaysus", says the Irishman, "!"  read joke

Added by: gwen23 on 05-Feb-2008 Tags: thinks | everything | Celebrities |

Lost all my luggage In category: Drunks/Bar jokes
McAteer arrived at J.F.K. Airport and wandered about the terminal with tears streaming down his cheeks. An airline employee asked him if he was already homesick. "No," replied McAteer. "I've lost all me luggage!" "How'd that happen?" "The cork fell out," said the Irishman.  read joke

Added by: gwen23 on 25-Dec-2007 Tags: Lost | luggage | Drunks/Bar jokes |

Cock fights In category: Ethnic
How can you tell if an Irishman is present at a cock fight? He enters a duck. How can you tell if a Pole is present? He bets money on the duck. How can you tell if an Italian is present? The duck wins.  read joke

Added by: fuzzyw on 23-Dec-2007 Tags: Cock | fights | Ethnic |

The three survivors of the shipwreck... In category: Ethnic
re being driven mad by hunger. The Irishman, an expert navigator, told the others that if they could row the lifeboat for three more days they could make landfall. The Pole, the ship's doctor, said that they could not possibly last that long, that there was only one solution to the problem and that one of them would have to sacrifice themselves for the good of the others. The Englishman, the captain, said that he quite understood and that he would volunteer as he should have gone down with the ship anyway. After saying an emotional farewell to his crewmen, the captain jumped overboard and sank without trace.  read joke

Added by: gwen23 on 28-Jan-2008 Tags: three | survivors | shipwreck... | Ethnic |

Irish math In category: Ethnic
There's these four Irishmen in a bar, all drinking Guinness. One of them is looking rather puzzled, so another turns to him and asks him what's the matter. 1st Irishman: Well, I was just trying to remember what 2 plus 2 is. 2nd Irishman: Oh, that's easy, it's 147. 1st Irishman: No no no, that can't be right. How about you, Fergus, do you know what 2 plus 2 is? 3rd Irishman: Hmmm ... could it be Wednesday, perhaps? 1st Irishman: No no no, that doesn't sound right either. How about you Pat, do you know? 4th Irishman: Simple, the answer is 4. 1st Irishman: Of course! How did you work it out?! 4th Irishman: Aha, that's where brains come in! I subtracted 147 from Wednesday!  read joke

Added by: gwen23 on 29-Dec-2007 Tags: Irish | math | Ethnic |

What happened to the Irishman who tried to kill... In category: Ethnic
Q: mself by ….swallowing 100 pain killers? A: After two he began to feel better.  read joke

Added by: demin23yy on 14-Dec-2007 Tags: What | happened | Irishman | tried | kill... | Ethnic |

An Irishman, Englishman and Scotchman sitting... In category: Ethnic
a beach notice a mermaid sitting on a rock. The Englishman approaches her and says 'Have you ever been kissed?' No says the Mermaid. He kisses her and she likes it. after a while the Scotchman approaches her and says 'Have you ever been fondled?'. She says no and he fondles her, much to her delight. After onother while the irishman approaces her and asks 'Have you ever been fucked?. she says no. 'Well you are fucked now because the tide's gone out.  read joke

Added by: ferda on 17-Dec-2007 Tags: Irishman | | Englishman | Scotchman | sitting... | Ethnic |

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